Hollywood Greats

I'm not obsessed with death - it's just a hobby.

I also love a good film and being of a certain age I believe  that many of the best films were made before CGI existed.

The Adventures of Robin Hood (1938), Stagecoach (1939), The Maltese Falcon (1941), Arsenic and Old Lace (1944) - I could go on, so I will.

From 12 Angry Men (1957) to Network (1976)  we were still getting great movies starring fantastic actors.

One of those actors died this past weekend, Peter O'Toole.


 I felt compelled to mention on Facebook how he was such a magnificent actor that he made any old pile of crap that he was in look classy - I would offer his portrayal of Priam in Troy (2004) as an example. There is one scene in which the once proud king is watching his city burn and you see all the anguish in his face - he doesn't offer one word. A masterclass in how to do nothing, yet say everything.

His legacy is secure - that he did not win an Oscar is a shame but it does not diminish his work in such films as The Lion In Winter (1968) or Goodbye Mr Chips (1969).

It was then announced this morning that the actress Joan Fontaine had died at the age of 96. 

Rebecca (1940), is another film I never tire of watching.

Anyway, let me get to the point. We are running out of stars, real Hollywood stars and we don't seem to be making any new ones!

Who is left?

Luise Rainer (aged 103) was a huge star in the 1930's - a double Oscar winner.

Olivia De Havilland (97) sister of Ms Fontaine although they famously did not get on!  

From the aforementioned Robin Hood film with Errol Flynn and of course Gone With The Wind (1939).

Kirk Douglas (97) - I'm Spartacus! And Van Gogh. And Doc Holliday. And Colonel Dax...etc.

Maureen O'Hara (93) the lady who could swashbuckle as well as any man but best known for her films with John Wayne.

Mickey Rooney (93) - need I say anything more than Mickey Rooney!

Doris Day (91),  Sir Christopher Lee (91), Richard Attenborough (90).

Lauren Bacall (89) and Angela Lansbury (88)

Clint Eastwood is 83 for goodness sake!

There are numerous other names I could add to this list but the point is made I think.

Do we really think that the films of Adam Sandler or Ben Stiller will still be as popular in 50 years time as the films of Jerry Lewis (87)?

Anyway, thanks for dropping by...it's just me mourning the loss of a great actor who famously once said:

I will not be a common man. I will stir the smooth sands of monotony.

RIP

Peace On Earth, Good Will Toward Men...

except atheists and all theists who don't believe Jesus was the son of god.

I have, this day, been defending the right of non Christians to celebrate at Christmas. Having been referred to as a hypocrite I decided that I should share my thoughts and feelings about this season of good will and what it means to a heathen atheist.

As someone who enjoys being a little bah humbug at this time of year (actually all year round) I was faced with a challenge in the writing of my Christmas themed 'Thought for the Day' which appears on BBC Radio Nottingham. Being a regular contributor over the past couple of years I did initially wonder how a non religious view of life would sit in the daily god slot - but people seem to respond positively to it and the producer keeps asking me back so it must be ok.

My Christmas themed message was based around the quote attributed to the Reverend Jesse Jackson, that it's not Christmas presents that matter but the presence of people who are important to you at Christmas that has real meaning.

When the piece was broadcast it prompted a listener to call in and berate anyone who isn't a Christian from celebrating the birth of Christ...hence my appearance this morning on the radio.

Let me point out at this juncture, that although when I speak multitudes listen and nod sagely in agreement, I do not speak for all Humanists...just the sensible ones.  The rabid secularists can make their own argument for pulling down Westminster Abbey and turning it into a multi story car park, I'm a bit more pragmatic.

Religion exists.

My moderate Humanist stand point on Christmas is that as a nation we celebrate a national holiday, a public holiday for all citizens no matter your faith or belief system. It involves Santa and lights and trees and cards and presents and carols and food and drink and families spending time together.

Some people love the idea of seeing old friends and family members, sharing a meal, a glass of cream sherry and perhaps reminiscing about how Christmases were better in the good old days.

Some people prefer to fly off to France or Austria and go skiing.

Sone cruise down to the Caribeano whilst some sit quietly at home and stroke their pussy.

A few of you might go to church for the only time in the year, sing a few carols and hear the Christmas fable retold by little children with tea towels on their heads.

There are some of course, devout and faithful followers of the Christian church, who will truly be celebrating the birth of their saviour. It is a deeply spiritual time for them and I do not deny them that right.


Of course the numbers of those who regularly attend church are still in decline and whether we like it or not, Christmas has become largely a secular holiday and I think we all have a right to join in the fun...and those of us who don't like the tea towel bit can ignore it and have another glass of  sherry.

So, back to the devout Christian caller who thinks it's hypocritical of me to enjoy this festive season...I have some questions for him.

The problem with banning atheists from Christmas is where would you draw the line?

Should writing a Christmas card be considered  a Christians only act?

Should hauling the faux tree out of its box for the umpteenth Christmas, covering it with red green and gold baubles (and the old robin) be considered a Christians only activity?

The Old Robin 

Should I be allowed to put crackers on the table?

Should I be allowed to have a welcome light in the window?

Should I be allowed a wreath on the door?

Should I open the door to the carol singers and smile at them before dropping a chocolate coin or two in the collection box?

Should I tell my mother not to send me any mince pies or cocoanut tarts but send them instead to a local vicar?

Would I even be allowed that glass of sherry?

Can I buy a turkey and stuff it?

Can I invite people to spend the day with us and share a meal and give thanks for life and happiness?

Where do the Christians want me to draw the line?

Let's make a deal Christians...you start gathering your tea towels and I'll start opening the Harvey's.

I promise I won't even think about Jesus and shepherds and wise men or kings.

I won't have a nativity scene anywhere in the house.

I won't even have a star on the tree, it'll just be the old robin.

I promise not to think about god.

If I promise all of the above and try just to have a nice day with nice people, will you allow me a few twinkling lights and a candle?

I don't want a lot for Christmas - I most certainly don't want to join in Christ-Mass but those of you who do, then go and do it. Celebrate the message of the birth of your saviour and leave me to watch Jurasic Park or Star Wars.

I'm not a petty man, I could have spent the whole of this blog pointing out the flaws in the virgin birth but that's not what I want my Christmas to be about.

My Christmas is about me, Mrs B, Miss Twillets and Polly, two coughing beagles and a turkey crown - it's about sitting in front of a real fire, sipping my sherry and watching Mrs Brown's Boys.

So, dear uncharitable unchristian caller - enjoy the holidays: WE WILL!

Birthday Message

Another year older but none the wiser, luckily I'm wise enough already.

What happened on this day throughout history (apart from my magnificent arrival) well in 1859 Charles Darwin published On The Origin Of Species. It had to be I was born on this day!


I share my birthday with William Webb Ellis, Grace Darling, Lucky Luciano, Billy Connolly, Ian Botham, Denise Crosby (the Star Trek link will not be lost on those who are devotees) and Stephen Merchant. Merchant is a comedy writer - so this is obviously a day when talent in that area was bountiful.

It's been a funny year, it has flown by in many ways and I'm still trying to make the most of the bonus time I have been granted.

For my birthday treat I shall be roasting a lamb, sacrificed in my honour.  Tomorrow I shall be attending the Royal Concert Hall in Nottingham to hear the John Wilson Orchestra play songs from the golden age of the Hollywood musical. Before that I shall be eating Italian food, a meal shared with my lovely wife and my parents. Mr & Mrs B Senior are visiting us for the week so we shall have to turn the heating up as you know how cold old folks can get!

Later in the week it will be French food before another trip to the theatre, this time to see Dreamboats and Petticoats, a jukebox musical with songs from the 1950's (and before you ask that is well before my time - cheeky).

It's a busy week what with rehearsals and final arrangements for Drag Queens on the 5th December...more on that another day.

Anyway, I don't want to take up a lot of your time today, merely to thank you all for being a part of my world.

My Mitty-esque belief that my guru status is actually of use to you keeps me going you know.

Enjoy life, enjoy each other and I leave you with some birthday wisdom:

Don't stand too near the cake after your 21st birthday - those candles throw out some heat!

Charity begins at home...

but should not stop there.

These are the words of Thomas Fuller a 17th century cleric and you know if I am quoting a vicar then it's about to get serious!

As I type this message to the faithful few, the Children In Need telethon is at full speed ahead on the telly. It's been a week to think about charity, what with the awful situation in the Philippines, and this morning on a BBC Nottingham web page, debate about charity was heated.

Someone had suggested that part of the money raised tonight should be given to children in the Philippines rather than just kept for children in the UK.

This suggestion seemed to bring to the surface all the xenophobia and little Englander rantings that I detest.  Comments like:

We shouldn't support the Philippines, what have they ever done for us?
Why not let Asia deal with an Asian problem?
There are children in this country who need the money more!

I could go on but it makes me sick to the stomach to even write them down.

My answer, which I posted on the web page was, why not donate to Children in Need for the UK based children and if you want to support the disaster fund just donate to them. Too sensible?

I have donated to the DEC fund, how could I not after hearing the stories about children standing under trees crying because the dead and rotting body of their mother was wedged among the branches or how all the children in one street were killed by the storm surge.

(There are children in this country who need the money more)

I may donate to Children In Need too as I am fortunate enough to have the resources at my disposal - I know some people are really struggling here thanks to the austere times we live in...there were several of them on the web complaining about that this morning too. Obviously not that austere a time if they have not had to forego their mobile phones and computers.

As the day has gone on I got more and more wound up by the sheer cold heartedness of some people who seem to think that children in need of clean water and basic food are less worthy than a child in the UK who may well have a genuine need but for something less basic.

But it's the xenophobia and sometimes outright racist attitude that some contributors displayed that is hardest to swallow.

But then it struck me - Children in Need raise money for children in the UK and I get the feeling that some of those racists who were talking about 'charity beginning at home' forgot something.

Not all children in need in the UK are white, nor are they necessarily British because some of them will be immigrant children or refugee children.

That made me laugh out loud - a real LOL moment.

IF (big if), IF the people who were talking about wanting their money to stay in this country, IF they actually donated some of there xenophobic pounds to the pot, how would they feel if all of their donations went too support a project like...the Romani Cultural and Arts Company...or Bristol Refugee Rights...or (there are others of course.)

Oh dear, have I let the cat out of the bag?

Charity begins at home but should not stop there.

This country is still a wealthy nation, we don't get battered by cyclones and hurricanes (and having your wheelie bin blown down the street is not as bad as having your city laid waste).

I don't grudge the children in the UK or anywhere, a chance for a better life but donating to the DEC appeal is a chance to grant the continuation of a life - full stop.

I hope Children in Need does well, I hope all the mouthy idiots put their hands in their pockets.

£30 million in 3 days for the DEC - we are a kind and wonderful people and obviously generous.

The act of giving is what counts, and really it's not even charity because we can afford it. It's only real charity if you give more than you can afford.

It's just common human decency to offer a helping hand.

Friday night rant ends - it's your money, you can put it where your mouth is or leave it in your pocket as far as I'm concerned.

It's your life.

Glass of clean water anyone?                Now where did I put that tap?

Autumn Leaves

The last time we spoke it was July, the sun blazed down and warmed the cockles of our hearts and maybe even the heart of your cockles. Now here we are in October, it's just past 11am and the sky is dark with rain and falling leaves.  The cycle of nature reminding us that we are part of a world that changes. But what will never change is my sense of duty and service to my dearly cherished flock...hello flock.

I know that some of your will have been following the progress of The Guru as a theatrical megastar on the other blog but today we have other fish to fry. It is Friday after all.

Mrs B and I have recently retuned from a pilgrimage to the Mediterranean, first class of course.

Our vessel of choice, a cruise ship - the Celebrity Eclipse. There were actually no celebrities to be seen anywhere on the ship but there were lots of stars and they are the reason the cruise was so enjoyable.

Speaking to the HR manager onboard, I discovered that there were 73 nationalities represented in the crew. From the UK to South Africa, the USA to Indonesia and Macedonia to Mauritius. 

I didn't spend a lot of time with officers and mangers though, I enjoyed talking to and interacting with waiters and stewards and I was reminded of the sacrifices these men and women make as they went out of their way to make our holiday enjoyable and memorable.

The working conditions for cruise ship crews have been well documented, but hearing first hand about how a man will leave his village in Bali to spend 9 months at sea, was eye opening. Yes, they can send home their wages to support the family they have left behind, but that family includes two young daughters who he is missing growing up.

One of the waiters spoke about how he promised his family to return home to Bali when the fruit ripened on the trees and started to fall - he was due to fly back the day after we docked. Indeed he should have flown earlier, but an OPEC conference meant the airport was closed. 

This warm funny man, Made, with a huge smile and a talent to entertain, even invited us all to visit with him. 

Our steward, Marijan, from Macedonia - with an excellent  grasp of English and obviously an intelligent well read man who enjoyed talking to me about 'Of Mice and Men', which he saw I was reading.

Aleksandr, also from Macedonia, our wine waiter (he earned his tip). Clever and articulate, honest and decent and with the potential to go so much further in life than being abused by snobby, Daily Mail reading idiots who occupied tables near ours. 

I have to say there was a lot of moaning and whinging about poor food and service but in fact the food and the service was excellent - some people are just never satisfied. But Made and his madcap helper Deepuksing (from Mauritius) just kept smiling and serving.

I have to mention a young man called Ryan too, a waiter whose smile lit up the room. He was from China where I suspect he wasn't born with the name Ryan, but here he was, making a place and a name for himself in the world. 

There was Ketut, another warm friendly soul from Bali, who really did all he could to make sure we were spoiled rotten. 

It was Aleksandr who asked us one evening how it felt to be waited on, to be the centre of so much attention and I replied that for two weeks I would manage! A little flippant, as you might expect, but again, this made me think. 

After two weeks I could return to normal life, making my own cup of tea, managing with yoghurt and fruit not bacon and egg every day for breakfast. No more bow ties for dinner, just a lap tray and The Great British Bake Off on tv. 

Normal life - for Aleksandr, for Made, for Ryan - for all of them: more smiles, more service, more abuse from ignorant, xenophobic middle class snobs.

They have my respect and admiration and the next time I hear someone talking about immigrants from eastern Europe coming to take jobs in Mansfield, I will think about Marijan...who took a job no one from Mansfield would ever dream of taking on. Cleaning toilets and making beds so that Mrs B and I could be spoiled for two weeks.

In 'Of Mice and Men', John Steinbeck wrote -

"Guys like us got nothing to look ahead to”. 

That quote is not aimed at the stewards and waiters on the Celebrity Eclipse but at those passengers who looked right through them as if they were not there, or who thought it OK to abuse them as they were there to serve.

The men I met do have something to look ahead to - even if it's only ripened fruit on a tree in Bali.

Thank you to all of those men and women who made my two weeks in the sun so happy.