Wednesday 16 April 2014

An Early Easter Message

Some of my friends live life with God. Some do not.

Some have lived with God for many years and some have just found him...that's a game of hide and seek you don't really expect to win against an omnipotent being.

Be honest, if an all powerful master planner who allegedly created the whole earth and everything on it, (even Nigel Farage) didn't want to be found, you'd never find him.

The answer must be that he wanted to be found!

In fact, he probably didn't hide at all. He just stood around long enough and eventually he got noticed.

It's the same with Prince Charles - eventually someone will notice him too.

Anyway, this early Easter message is aimed at all of my friends and will no doubt upset and amuse in equal measure but that would appear to be my role in life - to speak up and ruffle the feathers on the belly of the bird of truth.

Of course, when I refer to the truth I only mean the truth that I create very much in line with the truth that various religions create.

I'm going to re-post a few of my previous easter messages as well as this new missive and I think you will clearly see that although I do make room for other people in my life to believe what they will, I totally reserve the right to question the concept of faith. I have questions...

You all remember Kirk Douglas being nailed to a cross at the end of Spartacus? He and hundreds of other rebellious slaves were crucified by the Romans. Throughout history tens of thousands of people were executed by the Romans and crucifixion was a favourite method. In AD 70, Emperor Titus was nailing up 500 a day!

An interesting point to make here, all of those dead crucified people and yet archaeologists have apparently only ever found one body which shows signs of crucifixion. Why is that?

I'm glad you asked.

It would appear that historically crucifixion was used as a particularly cruel and humiliating way of punishment. The victim would be tied, not nailed, to a cross and the idea was you suffered a long slow death over a few days. Eventually you would become so tired, your head would fall forward on your chest and you would die of oxygen starvation.

To make sure the suffering lasted as long as possible the Romans even put little wooden struts for your feet to rest on. If after two or three days of suffering you were still hanging on, they would break your legs thereby hastening the end as you would no longer be able to support your weight.

After you were dead, you were left to hang until the birds and the animals had picked your bones clean of flesh before the bones were just thrown away...not buried. Burial was deemed a great honour so why honour a criminal who had done something that awful he needed to be crucified?

This explains why no archaeological remains were found of crucified bodies - they were not worth the effort of burying.

I bet you can already see where I'm going with this can't you?

OK - follow my logic. Jesus was allegedly crucified at about 9am in the morning (according to the gospels) and he was dead by 3pm. This was discovered by the soldiers who were sent by Pilate to expedite his demise as the Sabbath was approaching and a crucifixion would have defiled that sacred day.

But the soldiers didn't have to break his legs - as I say, he'd already died. Not three days, just a few hours. The soldiers are reported to have broken the legs of the other two criminals being executed with Jesus.

Here is my question...why execute a man by this slowest form of capital punishment with the Sabbath fast approaching? Why not use one of the many other ways that are so common in the Bible...stoning, burning, beheading? And why did Jesus die so quickly - even Pilate questions this according to the gospels.

And then why break with all tradition and allow this worst of all criminals to be buried - why grant him this honour?

Doesn't make sense.

Now, the resurrection...the first gospel, the gospel of Mark was probably written around AD 70. Six hundred and sixty five verses and only eight mention the resurrection.

Here is an excerpt from the new King James bible...

16 Now when the Sabbath was past, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James, and Salome bought spices, that they might come and anoint Him. 2 Very early in the morning, on the first day of the week, they came to the tomb when the sun had risen. 3 And they said among themselves, “Who will roll away the stone from the door of the tomb for us?” 4 But when they looked up, they saw that the stone had been rolled away—for it was very large. 5 And entering the tomb, they saw a young man clothed in a long white robe sitting on the right side; and they were alarmed.

6 But he said to them, “Do not be alarmed. You seek Jesus of Nazareth, who was crucified. He is risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid Him. 7 But go, tell His disciples—and Peter—that He is going before you into Galilee; there you will see Him, as He said to you.”


The subsequent gospels take this part of the story and make it more...well, more miraculous!

Here is what Luke wrote some 10 years later...

24 Now on the first day of the week, very early in the morning, they, and certain other women with them,[a] came to the tomb bringing the spices which they had prepared. 2 But they found the stone rolled away from the tomb. 3 Then they went in and did not find the body of the Lord Jesus. 4 And it happened, as they were greatly[b] perplexed about this, that behold, two men stood by them in shining garments. 5 Then, as they were afraid and bowed their faces to the earth, they said to them, “Why do you seek the living among the dead? 6 He is not here, but is risen! Remember how He spoke to you when He was still in Galilee, 7 saying, ‘The Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men, and be crucified, and the third day rise again.


And finally John, perhaps 20 years after Mark wrote that original account...


But Mary stood outside by the tomb weeping, and as she wept she stooped down and looked into the tomb. 12 And she saw two angels in white sitting, one at the head and the other at the feet, where the body of Jesus had lain. 13 Then they said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?”
She said to them, “Because they have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid Him.” 14 Now when she had said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, and did not know that it was Jesus. 15 Jesus said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?” She, supposing Him to be the gardener, said to Him, “Sir, if You have carried Him away, tell me where You have laid Him, and I will take Him away.”

16 Jesus said to her, “Mary!” She turned and said to Him,[a] “Rabboni!” (which is to say, Teacher).



Why the need to sex up the story? Well, the truth is that Christianity was still struggling to make a place for itself in the world and the idea of resurrection was just another way of persuading the faithful or the potential faithful to sign up for everlasting life.

What lies at the centre of Christianity is a belief that a physical body can be resurrected.  It's a fulfilment of the promise - without resurrection what is the point of this faith?

That's why the story got more explicit over time - the people in charge realised that this was the hook.  You all get a second chance.

As I say, people are free to believe what they will, but to never question such an obvious twisting of a story so as to make it more appealing seems strange.

You can see how Tony Blair thought he could get away with it...just make the story fit your beliefs.


Whatever your belief or faith, whether in some sort of god or just humanity - please don't forget we have the capacity to think and reason and grow.

For me, what makes being human so precious is that this journey through life is finite. I have no expectation of eternal life and I would hate the idea of missing out on this life whilst I was worrying about the next.

Happy Easter.


http://drew-theviewfromthehill.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/god-why-dont-you-love-me-blues.html

http://drew-theviewfromthehill.blogspot.co.uk/2011/04/easter-message.html

http://drew-theviewfromthehill.blogspot.co.uk/2010/04/view-from-hill-on-friday-2nd-april-good.html

















Monday 14 April 2014

Clapham Omnibus

You wait around for 8 weeks and then two blogs come along - you lucky people!

(Anyone who reads the words 'you lucky people' and thinks Tommy Trinder, take a bonus point.)

Don't worry, I'm not about to start turning out one a day again - I set myself that challenge once before and when I read back some of the drivel I produced I'm amazed I'm not working as a speech writer for Sooty.

So what stirs the old Guru into action this morning I hear you cry...it's Bubba.

Bubba.

All together....Bubba.

I sat up last night and watched the final round of the Masters golf tournament. It's the only time I ever  get to watch extensive golf coverage these days and thank goodness the final two days were carried on the BBC. I cannot stand the commentary team on Sky Sports and for me golf isn't golf without Peter Alliss and Ken Brown.

Alliss has this wonderful way of being avuncular and curmudgeonly (thanks Vince) and for saying quite inappropriate things which he gets away with as he is now 107 years old.

Ken Brown has a childlike quality and is never happier than when he is rolling his balls across a green or scribbling on a nice picture of the golf course to demonstrate what will happen if he does roll his balls.

Augusta National is a beautiful golf course and treacherous to any golfer who underestimates it, case in point young Jordan Spieth. I had a feeling the 20yr old Texan might win and that appealed to me as  it would have meant that Tiger Woods would no longer be the youngest winner...I'm not a fan of Mr Woods.

Spieth showed his lack of experience at hole 12 and pretty much threw away his chance to win the green jacket.

Meanwhile Bubba, oh yes I said Bubba, overpowered the course in a style all of his own.

Peter Alliss compared him to Lee Trevino but for me there were flashes of Seve Ballesteros too.

Cavalier and unrestrained - I wish I could play golf with such freedom.

Sadly my old body doesn't have the energy to power a drive  300 yards - although I did once win a long drive competition  (245yards) but that was more than 20 years ago.

Anyway, Bubba hit one drive 366 yards...the man is a remarkable golfer and you can't help but like him.

Of course, some people would get a little sniffy about the 'Bubba' aspect. He has referred to himself as a new age redneck, but from all I read of his character and attitude he would appear to be a nice man and isn't it nice when nice people have nice things happen to them?

His birth name is not Bubba, it's Gerry but I think the way he plays golf disqualifies him from such a pedestrian name as Gerry. Bubba sort of suits him.

Of course he has his flaws, he's too religious by far but what do you expect from someone born in the southern states of the good ol' USA?

The story of his family life plus his charity work mark him out as a man to admire - and I'm firmly in this fan club.

So Bubba has his second win at Augusta and later this year he will no doubt be a star player in the US Ryder Cup team.

Now, the Ryder Cup is one of those competitions that again I always try and watch but my rusty old brain didn't serve me very well this year.  I have booked a holiday for the week of the Ryder Cup and I will be out of the country...let's hope the internet is working and the iPad is charged!

Sadly Sky will have the bulk of the coverage so perhaps being on holiday is a good thing as listening to Monty pontificate drives me mad.

I suppose Peter Alliss will eventually have to retire, or maybe he will just quietly pass away with his microphone still clasped to his ancient lips.

I want his final words to be something like -  "Bubba spanks another monster up the fairway - go on you beauty".


















Sunday 13 April 2014

I'm Still Here.

"Good times and bum times, I've seen them all..."


Forgive me my cherubs, it has been almost 8 weeks since my last confession. In that time I have been very naughty but I'm sure you will forgive me because that's what we do in a relationship as special as ours. 

Rising early on this Sunday morning has put me ahead of schedule today so I find I have a small window of opportunity to irritate you all or brighten your dreary lives. It's all about perspective.

As I was taking Mrs B her third cup of tea and her bacon sandwich it occurred to me that I am fast approaching the 17th anniversary of my retirement from the Police. It made me think about the journey I have been on these last 17 years and I posed myself this question...am I continent?

Hang on, I think that should say content not continent but in any case I am (on both accounts).

I have made up a saying, a little quotation for you all to keep as your new signpost in life and that saying is:

      You cannot become who you are without first accepting who you were.

Towards the end of my Police service I was very unwell and I have no doubt that leaving was exactly the right thing to do. There were many issues which I do not want to revisit today but sufficed to say I did not feel that I fitted in with that organisation at that time. I'm sure many people in the organisation would have agreed that I didn't fit in!

17 years later I feel that I am exactly where I should be and I have a life that is fulfilling and I share my journey with people who respect me and accept me for who I am...a miserable old bugger who still manages to make people believe he's loveable. I'm a bit like the old dog who grumbles when you stroke him but can't quite bring himself to bite.

I have come to terms with the past and I no longer fear to examine those memories of tough days as they no longer have any power over me.

Sadly, some of my former workmates are stuck firmly in the past, either revisiting perceived past glories (times were never better) or avoiding dark memories surrounding perceived failures.

I have mentioned in earlier blogs how having George Dixon as a role model didn't really cut it in the  misogynistic and sometimes intolerant world of 1980's British policing.

Looking back at some of the things that were done and covered up in those days still makes me cringe and of course high profile examples are still in the news today - take Hillsborough for example.

I should point out that I worked with many many decent people who gave 100% to the job but sadly there was a minority of officers who made life very difficult for both myself and Mrs B.

Anyway, in the 17 years since we parted company I would like to think that British policing has changed and it certainly does give the impression of being more tolerant and forward thinking.


One thing that has happened in the last 17 years is that I now couldn't care less if people don't like me or cannot accept me for being who I am.

 I used to obsess that 'not fitting in' marked me out as a bad person. (Actually I now strongly believe it marked me out as a better person but I'm too modest to say that.)

So, on this Sunday morning, full of tea and bacon sandwiches, you find a very content man.

I know that to get here, I had to be there.

I know that being there helped create the circumstances that make here such a great place to be.

In reality there are very few differences between who I was and who I am except maybe less hair. And the hair I do have left is grey.  I have a few wrinkles and a few extra pounds too...but I'm still here!

Oh and by the way - if you still don't like me for being who I am, you can BUGGER OFF!