Friday 18 June 2010

The View from the Hill on Friday 18th June

Well done to my nephew Sam and his band - How To Kill A King - they won the battle of the bands competition they had entered. Very proud making for us all.

My musical talent lies in a superb singing voice which many of you may have heard, but in younger days I did play the bass in a band - not a guitar bass, but the oompah oompah type. I think I was the only one with enough wind to blow the bloody thing.

The one thing about playing the bass is you never get any solo spots, they always went to the showy instruments like the cornet or the trombone, while you just puff along like an old steam train under the melody.

In recent times I had thought about learning to play an instrument, something like the clarinet or even the ukelele, but with my bitten finger nails, I'd more than likely end up with my fingers in shreds on the carpet. So I'll just stick to singing and in fact as I have some time on my hands today I might record another track in celebration of Sam and his victory - in fact I think the time has come for me to release an album and I think it should be an all request album so please send your requests to me. I will consider all requests except the request never to sing again!

England play their second match tonight and Mrs B and I have decided to watch it via the Sky+ again, I have even put a picture of Wayne Rooney on my Facebook page profile so as to be more supportive of the team - so come on England, lose so we can put all this fuss and nonsense behind us and concentrate on the golf from Pebble Beach!

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If music be the food of love, play on,
Give me excess of it; that surfeiting,
The appetite may sicken, and so die.

W Shakespeare

Twelfth Night

Thursday 17 June 2010

The View from the Hill on Thursday 17th June

I must apologise in advance for the use of a rude word - but yesterday I couldn't go anywhere without this word jumping out at me. It was everywhere, even in the local paper there were pages and pages where this word was used repeatedly...so I'm sorry but I'm only reporting the story(s) as told to me.

This lovely warm weather has caught some people out, some are wearing their summer clothes, others still frightened of the rain, get caught out in blazing sunshine in heavy jeans and the like - and this can cause some problems. In the local paper there was quite a lot of coverage about cockchafers and I just thought, well, warm weather and the wrong clothes - what do you expect! Then I read on and realised it was actually a story about some beetles that are infesting the gardens of Mansfield, they lay their eggs and you end up with little brown patches in your grass....I used to get that but it wasn't cockchafers it was dog eggs.

Anyhow, talcum powder seems to be the best way to prevent any further problems, talcum and loose cotton underwear.

I came back from visiting a family last evening and was still chuckling when I got in, I explained to Mrs B why. The lady that had died was well into her 80's and her family were telling me that she was a game old bird which was quite apt because she loved to feed the birds in the garden, she even had a trained robin which came when she called. One day her daughter arrived at the house to find her mother stood on the doorstep dressed in her dressing gown, ankle socks, slippers and curlers and at the top of her voice she was shouting "Cock!" She repeated the word several times in quite a desperate fashion and her daughter said to her "for goodness sake Mother - what are you doing?" "I can't find the robin" came her reply.

It turned out that this was the name she had given the little bird and for years she had been standing on the doorstep shouting for cock.

So, there we have it - two cock stories and no balls.

I just realised my dispersible aspirin tastes a bit sweet this morning and I am thinking perhaps I may have dissolved a sweetener instead - which means Mrs B has the aspirin in her tea!

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If the cock does not crow before sunset, either it will rain the next day - or the cock is dead!

Dutch Proverb

(I blame the fox)

Monday 14 June 2010

The View from the Hill on Monday 14th June

The manner in which a new word can sneak its way into the national lexicon never ceases to amaze me, and the latest word is one that nobody had really heard until the World Cup - vuvuzela.

But now we all know what a vuvuzela is and we know how irritating they can be, we have some wonderful options for new insults to be framed, such as "James Corden at number one - he sings like a really bad vuvuzela"! (That was for Liam).

So from this day forward I challenge you all to find people who are loud, monotonous and irritating and present them with the title - vuvuzela of the week.

The Tony Awards took place in Radio City Music Hall last night with some very nice results for the British  including an honorary award for Sir Alan Ayckbourn, supporting actor to Eddie Redmayne and best actor and actress in a musical going to Catherine Zeta Jones and Douglas Hodge. Of course the BBC are not really covering these wins in the same way they would best actor at the Oscars - theatre not as important as film you see.

In fact it was a great day for British wins, in motor racing Hamilton and Button leading the way, in golf Lee Westwood hitting form the week before the US Open - if only the football players could emulate this winning form, we would all go out and buy vuvuzelas - if for no other reason than to drown out the pundits, the commentators and James Corden. (That was for Liam again).

A busy day today, but a quieter week on the whole and hopefully a chance to record some mini podcasts and play with my equipment.

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There won't be trumpets....

Stephen Sondheim