Tuesday 18 February 2014

If God Existed Would She Have A Sense Of Humour?


Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving.

Ephesians 5:4



It's been a few weeks since last I invaded your personal space but having a little time on my hands and being poked into action by recent events in the news - here I am!

I hope you are already giving thanks.

Let me first put on record that I still believe that people are free to follow their own path through life - it is their life and their choice. I also believe choices can and should be questioned and I am totally open to any of my friends who wish to poke fun at me for not believing in imaginary gods.

I also want to say that during this blog I might seem to be laughing at a recent death reported in the media - I am not unaware of the distress this bereavement will have caused the family and my examination of the situation is used to poke fun at religion not this tragic death.


Pastor Jamie Coots, the snake handing pastor from Kentucky, died after refusing treatment for a snake bite. His faith was so strong he believed he would not need medical attention. His death is a tragedy for his family and a victory for snakes.

If Pastor Coots had read the bible more closely he would have seen that his actions were not recommended. In fact in Matthew 4:7, Jesus gets quite shirty with Satan about testing daddies unconditional love and protection.


This is another case of the stupidity of mankind and considering Pastor Coots believed we were made in the image of his god, it doesn't say much for the big kahuna.

I suppose any real sadness at Pastor Coots demise will be short lived as the true believers will now picture him sat in heaven, eternally loved and safe from his own actions as snakes are not allowed in.

I know you are not supposed to question faith, you should just accept and bleat meekly then follow the furry bottom of the lamb in front of you, straight into the meat factory.

Well, I can't do it. I have questions...so many questions.

Let's start with the bible - the book that has been rewritten and translated so many times and each time adapted for the needs of the translator. Why do some people still take every word literally? And how do those who only go on about Jesus divorce the two testaments so quickly when they are about the same god?


Some people still believe in creation, as written in the bible...god created every animal, bug, virus and even the people that appear on Jeremy Kyle. So if god created poisonous snakes and gave then a rattle to warn men to keep away - why would you question his/her plan and pick one up?

The bible is full of rules for life - rules that if you follow and obey might see you survive long enough  to learn about how dangerous snakes are.

Rules for working - but also for resting.

The bible tells us we should be stoned for working on the Sabbath.

Rules for happy marriages.  Adulterers should be put to death, by stoning.

Rules for keeping god important in your life. Blasphemers will be put to death...you guessed it. Stoning!

Rules for keeping livestock in line. Oxen that kill people.  Stone them to death. Surely that's just an excuse for a barbecue at the wake?

Women who falsely claimed to be virgins on their wedding night - stone them.

People who worship Thor - stone them.

Children who disobey their parents - stone them.

Do you think it possible that the original authors of the bible had shares in a stone business?

Rules for employment -  slavery is OK as we need someone to gather the stones.


I always believed that the bible is a book of its time not a book for all time.

The 'love' bit, the Jesus bit, well that almost seems to be written as an antidote for the hate and fear that shine out of the 'old testament'.

But it's all one book, all written about the same vengeful god and yet the clever resourceful church now gets you to focus just on Jesus...Jesus saved me, Jesus is love.

Hold on, isn't Jesus the son of the spiteful chap who likes throwing rocks at people according to the book about Jesus?

Didn't Jesus do all he did because he believed in the love of his father - according to the book about Jesus?

Or is it now the way with modern religion that we take the concept of Jesus and talk about the message of love and deny its progenitor?

Matthew 5:17 - Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. (Jesus)

At least Jesus had the decency to admit that he believed and supported all that had gone before, that is according to the book about Jesus.

In Matthew 15 he even reprimands the Pharisees for not killing disobedient children as per the rules...pass me a bucket of stones please, the kids won't turn off the X Box and go to bed.

Can you see why I have questions about faith?

Jesus died on a cross and rose again and we are just supposed to believe it as an absolute truth?  And that truth is supposed to bring us comfort in death, because we can all aspire to a life after death.

Well, my path is the one which is about life before death.

I think it possible to love your fellow man without god (any god) or Jesus (or any other prophet) being involved.

I think it possible to look at the world with a sense of awe without thinking somebody must have made it.

I think it possible to find purpose in life without some eternal reward...you can do the right thing because it is the right thing to do!

And I KNOW without doubt, that if I ever see a snake I will NEVER pick it up.