Thin cut Oxford marmalade on dark wholemeal bread with just the merest amount of butter - smashing way to start the day.
The above statement is the nearest thing to normal I can promise today, we are about to enter the strange and unpredictable world of my strange world.
A gentleman named George Nissen has died aged 96, he invented the trampoline - now on the face of it a little discourse about the joys of trampolining or how it has graduated into an Olympic sport might have been forthcoming - but no! In my head, I hear the word trampoline and I see a giant penis being shown the door, denied the right of presenting Blue Peter.
I don't need any amateur psychology, I believe my reasoning in this matter is clear (to me) and I will try and explain.
Over the years Blue Peter had many presenters, I am a child of the Noakes, Purves and Singleton era. I do recall the arrival of Lesley Judd but after that it all gets a little blurry, that is until the great scandal of the trampolining champion - Michael Sundin.
Michael replaced Peter Duncan in 1984 - he managed 77 episodes before he was booted out of the door for 'failing to have a rapport' with the audience. Michael himself thought the reason was based in him being openly gay, his lifestyle and the fact that letters of complaint had been received at the BBC about his effeminacy.
Whatever the reason, he left and subsequently died aged just 28.
After Blue Peter though, he took on various small acting roles,one of which was to play an artists model in a BBC series called Artists and Models - Gericault. The painting being looked at in the episode was The Raft of the Medusa
Michael Sundin played the part of the young man on the edge of the raft - it was a very well set piece, the differences between the original and the live version were small in number but large in difference - Mr Sundin had a huge penis and the papers picked it up....let me rephrase, journalists had a field day with it....no, that's not right...it was to be reported in the press and the Daily Mail brigade were full of righteous indignation - telling the world that Biddy Baxter had done children a favour by sacking this man. Fancy allowing a man with such a huge penis to speak to children!
So, from trampoline to huge penis in one easy bounce - I don't watch Blue Peter anymore, you never know what the presenters have down their trousers!
Rest in Peace time folks - dear old Kenneth McKellar has sung his last....let's hear form him just one more time: