Think

January 14th

Think

I had a long chat with a bereaved family recently about how angry they were to discover that a beloved family member had died…via a Facebook post.

What made it worse is that the person who posted the news wasn’t even particularly close to the family.

My initial thought on the issue was that for many people social media exists to put ‘you’ at the centre of your universe.   You don’t think about the feelings of others, you just post things because it says something about you.  I may well have been guilty of this sin myself.

I’m hoping that many of your are thinking that you’d never post such a personal thing, especially when it affects others much more deeply than it affects you.  Good, that’s probably why your Facebook friends with me, because you are thoughtful and considerate of others.

Social media is something that I have a ‘love/not love' relationship with, especially as there is so much hatred and fake news and bullying to be found there.

The reason I remain connected to the world in this way is because there are also many reasonable voices to be found on social media and it is wonderful to discover that you’re not alone in the world. I made this very point to one of my Facebook friends recently when she mentioned she had considered leaving. Voices of reason, voices raised in concern for the planet and all on it, people campaigning for the arts or education or mental health issues; these voices are needed to try and bring some balance.

I say, “Facebook friend”, and I have actually met the person in question three times, but sometimes it feels like  the words ‘Facebook friend’ might be considered an oxymoron. I mean how is it possible to be a friend of someone you have never met?

And yet people are now apparently rated by the number of ‘friends’ they have or the number of re-tweets they get or the number of views they receive.

But let’s be positive: I can now chat with people on forums and groups about many shared interests including the theatre. I can interact with and support organisations in their charitable work or funding arts projects.

So whilst the inappropriately swift and unthinking post about someone’s death is at one end of the spectrum of posts, at the other end is social media coverage of events that are a great boon to me and others. I can’t tell you how many good theatre tickets I have booked after seeing something posted on the internet!

And everyday  brings the chance for new and exciting people to welcome you into their world, whilst joining you in yours. People from all around the world, and different walks of life. People from the arts whose work you love, people who are held in high regard in their field and yet will exchange a few kind words with the likes of me.

For all its faults, social media has given me a chance to do things I might not have done and meet people I might never otherwise have met.

I guess the moral of this post, if morality is still a term people understand, is perhaps before we post anything, we might pause and think about how this will affect others. Step out of the centre of your universe and stand in someone else’s just for a bit.

I can be more succinct, in less than 140 characters even: Don’t post about someone being dead until you’re sure that the family are aware.

Thanks.