Clapham Omnibus

You wait around for 8 weeks and then two blogs come along - you lucky people!

(Anyone who reads the words 'you lucky people' and thinks Tommy Trinder, take a bonus point.)

Don't worry, I'm not about to start turning out one a day again - I set myself that challenge once before and when I read back some of the drivel I produced I'm amazed I'm not working as a speech writer for Sooty.

So what stirs the old Guru into action this morning I hear you cry...it's Bubba.

Bubba.

All together....Bubba.

I sat up last night and watched the final round of the Masters golf tournament. It's the only time I ever  get to watch extensive golf coverage these days and thank goodness the final two days were carried on the BBC. I cannot stand the commentary team on Sky Sports and for me golf isn't golf without Peter Alliss and Ken Brown.

Alliss has this wonderful way of being avuncular and curmudgeonly (thanks Vince) and for saying quite inappropriate things which he gets away with as he is now 107 years old.

Ken Brown has a childlike quality and is never happier than when he is rolling his balls across a green or scribbling on a nice picture of the golf course to demonstrate what will happen if he does roll his balls.

Augusta National is a beautiful golf course and treacherous to any golfer who underestimates it, case in point young Jordan Spieth. I had a feeling the 20yr old Texan might win and that appealed to me as  it would have meant that Tiger Woods would no longer be the youngest winner...I'm not a fan of Mr Woods.

Spieth showed his lack of experience at hole 12 and pretty much threw away his chance to win the green jacket.

Meanwhile Bubba, oh yes I said Bubba, overpowered the course in a style all of his own.

Peter Alliss compared him to Lee Trevino but for me there were flashes of Seve Ballesteros too.

Cavalier and unrestrained - I wish I could play golf with such freedom.

Sadly my old body doesn't have the energy to power a drive  300 yards - although I did once win a long drive competition  (245yards) but that was more than 20 years ago.

Anyway, Bubba hit one drive 366 yards...the man is a remarkable golfer and you can't help but like him.

Of course, some people would get a little sniffy about the 'Bubba' aspect. He has referred to himself as a new age redneck, but from all I read of his character and attitude he would appear to be a nice man and isn't it nice when nice people have nice things happen to them?

His birth name is not Bubba, it's Gerry but I think the way he plays golf disqualifies him from such a pedestrian name as Gerry. Bubba sort of suits him.

Of course he has his flaws, he's too religious by far but what do you expect from someone born in the southern states of the good ol' USA?

The story of his family life plus his charity work mark him out as a man to admire - and I'm firmly in this fan club.

So Bubba has his second win at Augusta and later this year he will no doubt be a star player in the US Ryder Cup team.

Now, the Ryder Cup is one of those competitions that again I always try and watch but my rusty old brain didn't serve me very well this year.  I have booked a holiday for the week of the Ryder Cup and I will be out of the country...let's hope the internet is working and the iPad is charged!

Sadly Sky will have the bulk of the coverage so perhaps being on holiday is a good thing as listening to Monty pontificate drives me mad.

I suppose Peter Alliss will eventually have to retire, or maybe he will just quietly pass away with his microphone still clasped to his ancient lips.

I want his final words to be something like -  "Bubba spanks another monster up the fairway - go on you beauty".