The View from the Hill on Wednesday 24th March

It is a wet and miserable morning here on the Hill and I would have liked a nicer day as I have a woodland burial today, and standing in the rain planting trees and people is not nice.

I like the concept of natural burial, having a tree planted on you so as to really put something back into nature. It might be the first really giving thing some people do with their lives. Let me add that the gentleman I am burying today was a very nice man, he had the most content life - he never married.

So is everyone excited? Are you all going to be glued to your radios and televisions this afternoon? No?
But it's Alastair Darling!

It's bring your pets to work day and Alastair is going to do a show and tell about his pet Budgie.

His predecessor, Polyphemus Brown, he had a Budgie too, it was called Prudence; I don't know what Alastair calls his budgie but I have heard that it is a sad little chap and that it probably will not sing much.

The best part of bring your pets to work day is hearing the noises they make - I guarantee you will hear lots of cat calls and hissing snakes and the odd howler monkey making themselves known.

Polyphemus will be sat there stroking his pet, or Ed Balls as he is known. David Cameron will be trying to inspire his troops, they have some very poor looking pets, especially their ducks, which no longer have a house to live in.

Nick Clegg has a pet goldfish.

The BBC has bought in a special team to help identify the pets and how they will affect the day to day life of us normal folk, it is thought that there could be some post budgie-rage, especially for people with that most unnecessary of luxuries, a car.

By the end of the day, the little MP's will all go home, taking their pets with them, some will even take them on all expenses paid trips to Malta or Corfu - but that's another story children.

Let's all wish Alastair  a lovely day and let's hope his Budgie doesn't escape or get eaten by Ann Widdecombe's pussy.

Nick Clegg has a pet goldfish.

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Anon:
 
"A budget is just a method of worrying before you spend money, as well as afterward."



(I don't know who this Anon chap is, but he wrote an awful lot of quotes!)